Winning

Yes, I realise the title of this post refers to the Charlie Sheen phenomenon of the word "winning".  But you know what, after my little triumph of last night, I'm pleased with myself enough to use it, and not care about the associations.

I beat my insomnia last night.  It may have had something to do with the fact that the night before last, I only slept 3 hours, if that (broken routine - doh!  Not making that mistake again!!!).  So I was over- tired (made me a bit hyper and manic during the day).  

BUT.  I went back to my routine of a cup of tea at around 10pm, going to bed at 10.30pm, reading for an hour (or until the words start wriggling) and turning my light out.  I don't even remember the clock clicking past midnight.  This is spectacular.  Really.  Truly.  Because normally, even with this routine, I haven't been actually sleeping until after 1am.  

Granted, I did get up at 8.20am this morning, but it was a good effort!  I feel less... hyper and buzzy today.  Like I've actually rested, and that my brain stopped talking to itself for a bit.  That's what I love about sleep - the oblivion, where its like your brain switches off, and you don't think.  It's like a big blank.  Like a resting station before the next day full of thinking.  

I think that's what drives me nuts about insomnia, is that I don't get that break from my own thoughts.

Fingers crossed I can repeat this performance tonight!

Sidenote: I read a really lovely quote on one of my friends statuses today, and I have to copy and paste it here, because I really like it.  And I want to remember it.  

to live doesn't mean you're alive